“Why is it that even though I understand many truths, I still can’t live well?” This question resonates deeply with many people, and I have personally experienced it as well. We tend to think that maybe we haven’t truly grasped these truths, or we haven’t consistently practiced them, which leads to dissatisfaction in life. But is that really the case? Or put differently, are these so-called “life truths” truly flawless?
1. Those Simple Yet Complex “Life Truths”
Let’s first revisit some common life truths:
Follow Your Heart
This is a familiar piece of advice — “listen to your inner voice.” But is the heart really a fixed compass? Our inner feelings and thoughts constantly change. What we once desired might differ greatly from what we feel now, and our future feelings will be influenced by environment, relationships, and experiences. So, which inner voice should we actually follow?
Also, when reason tells you “you should do this” but your emotions resist, both are expressions of the inner self. Which one should you listen to? The rational “should” or the emotional “want”?
Don’t Forget Your Original Intention
The original intention is the ideal and goal set at the beginning — a lighthouse at the start of the journey. However, with time and changing circumstances, our inner self changes too. Does the original intention still fit the current self? Should we hold on, revise it, or let it go? How do we weigh these choices?
Persevere Until the End
When what you’re persisting in seems no longer worthwhile or yields little result, should you keep going or adjust flexibly? What standards do you use to decide to persist or quit? Your feelings? The reality around you? Or advice from others?
These questions actually have no fixed answers. Truths themselves are not simply “right” or “wrong.” What matters is how they fit your personal situation and environment. But reality is complex and ever-changing, and our inner world is turbulent. How can we make wise decisions? Where do we begin? No wonder many people feel lost and confused when facing life choices, constantly seeking answers outside.
2. Understanding the “True Self” and the Subconscious — Exploring the Inner Depths
I first encountered the concept of the “True Self” through Zhang Defen’s Meeting the Unknown Self. The book uses a vivid metaphor: consciousness is the horse, the subconscious is the coachman, and the “True Self” is the passenger inside the carriage. Although it seems the horse is pulling the carriage, the coachman controls the horse, while the actual direction is determined by the “True Self” seated inside.
We often assume the rational “consciousness” leads our life’s direction, but in reality, the subconscious controls our behaviors, and the “True Self” hides deep in the subconscious — the core self that has existed since birth. Life is a process of discovering the “True Self” — allowing it to gradually manifest, be noticed, and accepted by consciousness.
When the True Self reveals itself, one attains inner completeness and peace, experiencing joy.
But does the True Self really exist? How can we prove it? Even if it does, how do we find it? If “finding the True Self” becomes a life goal, what if we fail? Does that mean we’ve failed in life?
These questions have lingered in my mind, and perhaps you have similar doubts.
3. The Power and Nourishment of the Subconscious — Like Roots and Fruit
Master Ma Zengguang in his Money Code course presents an insightful view: the subconscious is like the roots of a tree, and the results in reality are the fruit. If the roots are lacking, the fruit will be poor; the richer the roots, the better the fruit. Nourishing the subconscious is like watering the roots — key factors include healing original family relationships, adjusting wealth mindset, and cultivating healthy inner patterns.
But here’s the question: does a rich subconscious automatically bring the “fruit” we want? The external environment also changes — the metaphor of “Southern oranges and Northern trifoliate orange” tells us that the same seed will bear different fruit in different environments.
So while nourishing the subconscious is important, how do we also balance and adapt to the external environment and our true desired outcomes? This is a thought-provoking challenge.
4. Harmonizing Consciousness and Subconsciousness — The Art of Taming the Subconscious
It was only after reading Ray Dalio’s Principles that I began to see a systematic answer:
- The subconscious indeed exists.
- Success is the harmony between consciousness and subconsciousness.
- Consciousness is responsible for taming the subconscious.
The subconscious is strong and primal, like a wild horse, while consciousness is the rider who controls direction and speed. The key to success is how well the rider tames the wild horse so they move in sync, rather than letting it run wild. Knowing many truths but failing to act is often because consciousness and subconsciousness have not reached harmony.
When a person achieves high cooperation between consciousness and subconsciousness, inner harmony is reached — this is the realm of “unity of heaven and man” and “integration of knowledge and action.”
5. Deepening Freud’s Tripartite Model — Id, Ego, and Superego
Freud’s theory of id, ego, and superego gives us a richer framework to understand the human psyche:
- Id (subconscious): the source of instinctual impulses, blindly pursuing instant gratification.
- Ego (consciousness): the reality negotiator, balancing id and superego.
- Superego: internalized morals and norms — the embodiment of civilization and reason.
These three constantly interact, shaping our behavior and experience. The process of consciousness taming the subconscious also involves the superego supervising and morally judging the ego.
6. Why Do We Still Struggle Despite Understanding So Much?
Despite understanding all these theories, confusion persists, perhaps because:
- Truths are abstract and dynamic, not directly transplantable to specific life contexts.
- Inner self and external environment are ever-changing, so the same “truth” requires ongoing adjustment and testing.
- The conflict between consciousness and subconsciousness takes time and practice to harmonize, not something solved by knowledge alone.
- Personal uniqueness and environmental complexity mean there’s no one-size-fits-all answer.
7. How to Move Forward Amid Confusion?
- Accept life’s uncertainty and complexity, and reduce rigid expectations of “must be this way.”
- Learn to observe and be aware of different inner voices, understanding inner changes are natural.
- Practice consciousness taming the subconscious through discipline, reflection, learning, and psychological work to gradually coordinate them.
- Dynamically adjust goals and original intentions, allowing them to evolve with inner self and environment.
- Pay attention to matching internal and external environments, nourish the subconscious while adapting to reality.
- Maintain curiosity and thirst for knowledge, use various wisdom tools (like NLP, coaching techniques, psychology), but keep critical thinking.
- Focus on long-term inner harmony rather than short-term external achievements. True success is the unity of inner and outer.
Summary
“Knowing many truths but still living poorly” doesn’t necessarily mean the truths are wrong or that you haven’t tried hard enough. Life itself is a complex system project. Only through the harmony of consciousness and subconsciousness, and the dynamic balance of inner and outer environments, can true inner peace and a rich life be attained. May your journey of self-exploration, mindset adjustment, and wise practice grow ever clearer and brighter.